Day 4, Post 1

OK before I bore you with my big long post, I would like to mention that what "they" say is true. I started excersizing and I certainly have NOT lost weight, in fact, I gained a pound! I hope it's pure muscle because it was a bit discouraging.

Yesterday was really tough and on my way home I almost lost it. I was in so much pain and could not walk faster than a slow shuffle and I had a long walk ahead of me. I really felt like I wanted someone to take care of me and make it all better.
I had just missed my bus, adn could have ran and caught another one, but alas, I could not run. So I decided to be first in line for the next one for a change. I put on my iPod, but then lucked out and ran into Crystal, with whom I chatted with all the way home. Having a friend to chat with on your commute really makes it sooo much better.

Once home I complained to my rommate and her GF for a while, then decided I must take a hot bubble bath to make it better. I did just so. I was able to stretch my legs muche asier in the hot water and it didn't hurt at all. I felt relatively normal for about an hour afterwards, and then they tightened up again. Wes soon came over and brought me dinner - bless his heart! And we watched a netflix and relaxed. He made me feel a lot better. during the movie my eyes got very heavy. It was only 9-something but I was soooo exxhausted. As soon as it was over we hit the hay. I slept really really well. I woke up hoping the pain would have subsided, but it didn't.

It might have gotten better though. I can not tell if it got better or perhaps I am just getting used to it. Either way I was not lucky this morning for a third time and had to walk the full distance, slowly, to work.

I am frustrated by how broke I am because i want to make big efforts to eat healthy, but I don't have many options at home rigtht now and don't want to exhaust my remaining funds on food when it's still over a week before i get paid, and I am sure I will need gas soon too.

Dieting, excersizing and quitting credit cards at the same time is tough!
I really would love to start some therapy to help me through all this, but I am afraid that with $30 copays, it would still be $120 per month that I can not afford.

*sigh* dispite all this sad news, I remain really hopeful and excited for the changes I am making and it doesn't hurt that I am in love :)